Haiku of the day: rain (ame)

The Mistress has been doing lots of Japan-related things of late, so please enjoy a haiku she made up this afternoon for a munchkin's amusement.

Rain on the windows
'Spring showers bring May flowers'
Too bad I can't breathe

What do dolphins call each other?

Scientists monitoring dolphins have determined that dolphins have names for one another and use them even when that dolphin is not present.
Just call me Dolph

What would be more interesting to know is this: what sorts of names? Bignose? Can't-Swim? Brownspot? Fast One? Four-Leg-Friend?

Six Degrees of Kevin Everyman

Invading foreign countries and then rebuilding them because that money couldn't possibly be better used improving our own schools, helping our own poor, stopping genocide, or feeding the hungry around the world: not enough.

No Child Left Behind: enough to "use" valuable classroom time and trained teachers in teaching to the test without financing this; otherwise, not enough.

Welcoming lobbyists and profiteers to the White House and government chambers: common enough, but not enough.

Claiming to love our country, but trying to pass laws against natural human diversity: not enough.

Getting rich off of gas prices: not enough. This is just the on-ramp!


The latest?
Six Degrees of Kevin Everyman's phone calls:
NSA has database of domestic US phone calls: report

Do you really think this will be enough?

Pentagoing, going, gone...

Pentagon photos were on the news tonight, and mention of the name "Pentagon" inspired these non-9/11-related jokes, some lamer than others:

They've renovated the Pentagon again. New name: the Hexagon.

You've probably heard some version of that one before (it was original for those who giggled over it), but maybe not these follow-ons:

They'll move it to Texas and call it the Texagon (to Mexico, the Mexagon).

They'll cover it with mirrors and call it the Reflectagon.

Install washers and dryers and call it the Socks-are-Gone. (or Pants-are-Gone)

Tip the Washington Monument over to ring the Pentagong.

Dang, can't remember the rest. The Mistress is sure that you're relieved by this.


...5/12/06 addendum: got 'em!

Mmm, Chexagon.

Stomp, stomp, stomp - here comes the T-Rexagon!

Split CA? TX? VA? Fix the flag first!

See the Dvorak Uncensored blog re: splitting California up into 2-3, or even more, smaller states.

I suggested that the U.S. flag be redesigned first, to *allow* for state boundary changes more easily. If we separate the flag issue from the addition or removal of states from our Union, things could proceed much more easily.

Celebrity babies: TomKat vs. Brooke Shields & hubby

Like many a female, the Mistress thought Tom Cruise was really something back in the day. Now he's pretty wacky and seems desperate for attention. Katie Holmes seemed snottily appropriate in Ang Lee's "The Ice Storm" (1987). Now she elicits pity.

So what did they name their (supposed) new baby, who just happened to be born along with Brooke Shields' second daughter Grier (which sounds awfully preppy but at least many people have heard of actress Greer Garson)?

Suri.

They claim it's Hebrew for "princess" and Persian for "red rose"; commentators give some less-appealing translations from other languages: "pointy nose" in a South Indian language; "pickpocket" in Japanese.

If you type "Suri" into the Google search engine, you get many listings for alpacas such as this one as well as links to various pages about people with the surname "Suri".

Sky News gets into this discussion as well, with readers sending in additional meanings.

At least it sounds pretty in English. L'chaim, baby Suri! May you not out-weird your parents.


Read the original articles about this particular oddly-named celebrity baby:
One Down: World Awaits Pitt, Jolie's Baby
Cruise-Holmes Baby: Day Two

4/24/06 addendum:
Get outta here! Cruise baby name puzzles Israelis

A Poem A Day The Fibonacci Way

More-regular blogger Gregory K. has given himself the exercise of writing Fibonacci sequence-based poems to stretch his mind: "a six line, 20 syllable poem with a syllable count by line of 1/1/2/3/5/8." Readers of his blog are invited to post their own.


Why
should
I write
one? Because
I might as well try
to learn this sequence right away.

Why
should
you write
one? Because
it's not all that hard,
so suck it up and start typing.

Super 'Shrooms!

Mushrooms Are Unlikely Source of Vitamin D

Nah, not *those* mushrooms. Just your plain ol' bland ones from the food store.

Mug me! (no, not the crime way)

This Sunday's Washington Post's shopping section pointed out a new Global Warming Mug. Watch the continents vanish under water! It's available online at Wacky Planet.

The company (with which the Mistress is not affiliated other than as a potential customer) has some other fab items for sale, including a Vanishing Civil Liberties Mug. See which parts of the Bill of Rights the Patriot Act does *not* excise!

Out with the old, in with the new (if you have room in your cabinets or on your trophy-mug shelf)!

A Taxing Nation

In honor of Tax Day, I refer you to two online articles and have movie suggestions for when your taxes are done.


The first is about politicians who are so confused by their own tax laws that they hire accountants to do their filing for them:
Tax Law Authors Have Pros Do Their Returns

The second begs for a flat tax. The author?
Dick Armey.

For your viewing pleasure, the Mistress strongly recommends that you rent the highly intelligent and amusing 1987 Japanese movie
A Taxing Woman (Marusa no onna) and its 1988 sequel, A Taxing Woman Returns (Marusa no onna II). Make yourself some popcorn, turn down the lights, and celebrate the end of Tax Day... This year's, anyway.

Huzzah!

Corn syrup once more: Mott's' tricky packaging

We're still seeing tons of sweetened applesauce, both at Baja Fresh and at the food store. The packaging on some is so confusing that extremely careful label-reading and comparison is required. My husband went to the store this week for more of the kids' favorite single-serving applesauce, Mott's Healthy Harvest Strawberry (which has no sugar added), among other things (regular shopping trip here - not a run for just one product). No, I don't get any money from Mott's. I just want to make sure there's no brand confusion here. I wrote "flavored applesauce (small)" or something to that effect on the shopping list. I didn't specify Healthy Harvest because he doesn't buy things with corn syrup if he knows it's there, and I figured he'd seen the packaging - and had bought it - often enough.

He came home with an almost identical-looking package - and it was strawberry, and it was Mott's. But it wasn't the unsweetened Healthy Harvest, and it had high fructose corn syrup (and Red 40 for good measure and an odd pinkish-red color).

I went to the Mott's web site to look up their single-serving applesauce options and wrote them a note. Go to the full post to see the text of my message to them...

I don't understand why you feel the need to sweeten applesauce with high fructose corn syrup (or color it with Red 40, for that matter). Applesauce is naturally sweet, especially strawberry flavored. There are enough kids with weight and/or dental problems without going to a restaurant and asking for "healthy" applesauce instead of chips or fries, only to be given your applesauce with corn syrup for your kids! Baja Fresh is one place that serves kids your sweetened applesauce.

Also, for truth in advertising purposes, you shouldn't put "Hand-Picked Goodness" on products that contain high fructose corn syrup. Since when was high fructose corn syrup hand-picked?

Finally - and very important - you need to make your packaging much clearer in order to allow consumers to easily delineate between your types of applesauce. More than once (including this week) either my husband or I have gone to buy small packages of applesauce, only to have to carefully scrutinize the label to be sure we're getting the unsweetened kind.

For everyone's health, why don't you just offer all of your great flavors only in the unsweetened variety and, whenever possible, as an organic? This would probably save you enough money on packaging and shelf space to balance out the added cost of going healthier.

If families really need sweeter applesauce to get their kids to eat it, they can easily add their own sugar or corn syrup, whether at home or at a restaurant.

Thank you!

A very concerned mom,

[signed my name and location]

So, if you're also concerned about calories and/or cavities, please get involved! Contact restaurants that serve sweetened applesauce and companies that make applesauce sweetened with anything other than fruit or fruit juice and ask them to CUT IT OUT already. The few of us (myself not included) who really need the extra calories can surely find their own sugar packets.

Thanks!!!

Presidential Zork!

Shrub plays Zork

So true, it's sad...

Additional links:
Infocom, the originators of Zork
play Java/Flash versions of Infocom games online!

Daily Show's Jon Stewart look-alike FOUND in Hebron!

From this Yahoo article on Jewish squatters in Hebron, here's
a photo of an open-mouthed Israeli who could be Jon Stewart's long-lost twin...

Egypt joins Iran in Holocaust denial

A bad wave on the horizon...

Muslim Brotherhood chief (opposition party leader, it must be noted) Mohammed Mahdi Akef publicly claims the Holocaust to be a myth:

Egypt Opposition Leader Denies Holocaust

A lot of the current wave of anti-Semitism seems to stem from hatred of America or the West in general. Funny thing, that - our President sure as heck isn't Jewish, let alone Zionist.

Man or Mouse? There's a reason we have three branches of government, Mr. President.

"One more last" for today... (my, aren't we verbose!)

As you've most likely been shocked to hear (or not), our Dear Leader, El Presidente Bush II (aka. SuperShrub), has admitted to ordering Americans to spy electronically on Americans in America without the bother of a court order. He protests less that this is being opposed than disclosed.

As with past leaders in our country and others, he chafes within his channel of Chief Executive and lends a blind ear (sounds right for him, no?) to countless cautious critics who decry a selective spy empire built upon a shadow government.

One of many^3 recent articles commenting on the situation: Bush vows to pursue controversial spy program.

To paraphrase Lord Acton: "Power corrupts; absolute power corrupts absolutely." The full quote is here. Whether bad or not, President Bush is not "great".

This man should NOT be allowed power beyond that granted to the Executive branch. Nor should any other man - or woman - who holds our Seat of Power. If our own President won't follow our laws and treat our citizens to the rights accorded us in our very own Constitution (and Bill of Rights, natch), then what sort of leader is he?

Foie gras, veal, astrakhan, and other extreme ways to hurt animals for your dining or fashion pleasure

Animals can be tasty, and their skins can be useful, but we don't have to be cruel and/or inhumane if and when we do take their lives and their bodies for our use.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Foie gras:
Liver of fatted goose.
Generally created by force-feeding geese.

See this recent Christian Science Monitor article on a foie gras ban proposed in Chicago.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Veal:
Meat of extremely young calves - ~16 weeks or younger.
Often produced by taking the calves away from their mothers when they are just a day or two old, feeding them a milk-like formula instead of their mothers' milk and then solid food, and confining them to tiny areas in which they can't move around. This is called "white veal" or "milk-fed veal". Nope, you were wrong! "Milk-fed" is *not* when the calf drinks its mother's milk!

See the HSUS' veal fact sheet for details.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Astrakhan, aka. Karakul:
Skin of newborn or even fetal "Persian lamb".
Soft and curly fur; used for coats and other garments. Warm; soft; drapes well. The Mistress' mother had Persian lamb coats twenty-some years ago, and the Mistress always loved the way the coats felt. She only found out what these were really made of this year, 2005.

See the HSUS' article 'Astrakhan: Hot "New" Fashion is the Same Old Cruelty'
The earlier, the curlier. Yuck! The veal of furs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
No, the Mistress is not a vegetarian. She likes steak a bit much to make that leap.

See the HSUS' article on humane slaughter.


Foie gras: geese are pretty stupid, but it still sounds nasty to force-feed animals so we can kill them to better enjoy eating specific organs.

Veal: the calves should have their mommies, and they should be allowed exercise. Period. If you must eat veal but are trying to be humane about it, ask for "pink veal". Reject "white" or "milk-fed" or "formula-fed". Cows may not be very smart, but they know enough to get upset when they are forcibly separated from their moms/calves.

Astrakhan, aka. Karakul: double ditto veal. Their origin is such a shame. Let's have some faux Persian lamb coats! Appreciate the look and feel without killing the lambs!

Suckling pig: not mentioned at top, but the Mistress avoids this and other fetal/newborn dishes like the Plague. The Mistress gets creeped out of late when rinsing (supermarket-purchased) chickens or small turkeys for roasting. Maybe now you will too.


Why?

Extrapolate. People crated from birth and force-fed liquid diets (or high-fat foods) would be awfully tasty to someone... or our skins would be extra-soft and appealing... This is *gross* - to us. Imagine if there were some animal on Earth that likes to eat people, or that likes to use our skins to decorate themselves - that's not as far out. This may seem absurd since we don't have alien overlords or billions of baby-eating, farming-minded lions on the prowl, but just do the gedanken. Stew on it for sixty seconds.

We're lucky to be at the top of the food chain. Very lucky.

Danger! Will Rob-Iran-soon?

Ah, the news from the Middle East just gets better and better. Not only does Iran's President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad hate America and Westernisms, but he is trying to convince people that the Holocaust was made up (!!!) and has called for Israel to pick up and move somewhere else. Actually, he wants Israel to be "wiped off the map". Yikes!

Iran's President Bans All Western Music

He was elected in August 2005. We (ie. the USA) didn't help to put him in power too, did we?

This guy is *DANGEROUS*.

Santa's big helper in El Cajon, CA

[with an introduction in silly verse]

If you think the world has gone to pot
And Santa Claus is coming not;
If Congress' excesses make you quiver
And wars abroad cause you to shiver;

If you despair when hoping
To find someone who's coping
Without selling out sometimes,

If bird flu worries
And holiday hurries
Are heavy on your mind,

Then read this article. Don't fear -
The Toy Maker is here!

The SignOnSanDiego.com article:
El Cajon craftsman gives Santa's elves competition

Three huge cheers for craftsman and Santa's helper Don Riley! Approximating the wonderful words of Bob Graham in his kiddie book "Max", Riley is "a small hero doing quiet deeds. The world needs more of these."

We do indeed.

Corn syrup redux: high-fructose diet BAD

This past Thursday, HealthDay summarized two articles published in medical journals about the effects of fructose on the human appetite. The research underlines and extends what I said earlier about corn syrup being awful for you. Alas, truth is worse than hypothesis: fructose seems to cause insulin problems and may make you feel HUNGRIER! So much for fruit-based diets?

Read the HealthDay article here:
Fruit Sugars Might Speed Obesity

Baltimore quint family needs help for the holidays and beyond!

Single babies are plenty of work. Parents of twins tell me they're hard to juggle. A family friend's daughter had triplets (after an older child) and somehow kept her sanity, but only with a *lot* of help. I couldn't imagine having that many or more at once. Yet it happens, and more than once in a blue moon.

A Baltimore family had *quintuplets* on September 21st and is still stumbling along, mostly on their own, because they've gotten more ridicule than assistance from the media. They're happy to be parents, but they weren't even trying to have kids - the now-mom was taking fertility drugs to fix a hormone problem, not because she was trying to get pregnant...

These parents deserve more than they're getting. Compare where they are with the magazine-cover quints of other years.

See Courtland Milloy's November 13th article in the Washington Post: "Few Answering Quintuplets' Needy Cries". Mr. Milloy's followup on November 27th: She's Taking It One Diaper At a Time gives contact info for the mom and for a fund to help support the quints. Thankfully, some help materialized in the interim but the hard-working parents could still use a minivan (to hold all five car seats!) and nanny service - not to mention financial and other support for their brood in the years to come.

If you or your company is looking for some end-of-year charitable contributions or has a hand to lend in the Baltimore area, I bet this family would appreciate your assistance.

Keep that holiday spirit alive!